Over most of my life, September has felt more like the beginning of a new year than January 1st ever has, likely because of conditioning from 12+ years of back-to-school shenanigans. Besides being the end of a tax year and all the annoyances that accompany that, January just feels like the beginning of the winter doldrums—simply grey and blah.

But September always held the twinkle of possibility.

I remember, as a child, excitedly cracking open that fresh pack of sharp, untouched pencil crayons, blissfully unaware of what future me would face that year. As we age, the smallness of the lives we live as children grows and grows as time ticks by. Until one day, we realise that "the unknown" feels less like that feeling of possibility we had opening up a new box of pencil crayons, and more like sitting by a daunting chasm of uncertainty. And for the more risk-averse among us, that blissful expectation slowly gets replaced by fear, anxiety, insecurity, and maybe even sadness.

Though I still get a little sparkle right after Labour Day, I realise that at this stage of my life, "new beginnings" gleam less than they did in my younger years. Beginnings feel more like endings, and uncertainty for the future sits in my belly like a knot of tangled emotions. In times like these, the old adage “better the devil you know, than the devil you don’t” echoes through my mind. 

Now that I’m well into middle age, I know the future is much more complex than I imagined as a kid. However, I also feel the most comfortable I’ve ever felt in my skin, and I have resources within myself that I simply did not have when I was a child. I’ve always envied those who feel comfortable taking big risks – it’s never been easy for me. However, it is my intention to get more comfortable with the discomfort of uncertainty so that I can experience the twinkle of possibility.

Life as a Gen Xer is riddled with uncertainties—whether grappling with financial security and the realities of looming retirement we aren’t prepared for, caring for aging parents while managing the health challenges that creep up, or worrying about the kind of future our children will inherit amidst an ever-shifting volatile political climate.

Uncertainty threatens our survival

As children, many of us feared the dark, imagining all sorts of eerie creatures hiding in the shadows. Though hopefully the fear of monsters under the bed dissipates as we grow older, discomfort with the unknown is wired right into our DNA. The most important function of our brains is survival, and uncertainty is a huge threat. Life as a Gen Xer is riddled with uncertainties—whether grappling with financial security and the realities of looming retirement we aren’t prepared for, caring for aging parents while managing the health challenges that creep up, or worrying about the kind of future our children will inherit amidst an ever-shifting volatile political climate. These layers of unpredictability are woven into our everyday lives, reminding us that change is the only constant we can truly rely on.

Uncertainty is particularly daunting when it accompanies a new beginning—whether it's starting a new job, moving to a different city, or entering a new phase of life. As much as we crave the excitement of fresh starts, they often come with an extra-large side of anxiety that can be incredibly hard to shake. So difficult, that sometimes we don’t even step into a new beginning. After all, there’s comfort in the known, even when the known is less than ideal. But as we’ve all learned by now, life has a way of pushing us into new territories, whether we feel ready or not.

In fact, a study by University College London found that uncertainty can be more stressful than knowing something bad is definitely going to happen. It turns out that the "not knowing" is often harder to handle than the thing we're afraid of in the first place.

Research shows that uncertainty can trigger stress responses in our bodies, and it’s not hard to see why. When we don't know what to expect, our brains go into overdrive trying to prepare for every possible outcome. In fact, a study by University College London found that uncertainty can be more stressful than knowing something bad is definitely going to happen. It turns out that the "not knowing" is often harder to handle than the thing we're afraid of in the first place.

Certainty is comforting, and it can also keep us stuck

We seek certainty and predictability because it feels safe to immerse ourselves in what we already know. Certainty calms our nervous system; it reassures us by providing answers rather than questions. For many of us, especially those who have experienced trauma, the need for certainty can be even more pronounced. Routines, belief systems, and safety nets help create a sense of security that supports us in managing uncertainty.

But we must remember that too much certainty keeps us stuck in the status quo, limiting both our growth and the possibilities that come with embracing the unknown. Neuroscientist Beau Lotto says that the only time we actually experience freedom is when we choose to step into uncertainty. 

Uncertainty is the birthplace of creativity and growth

As uncomfortable as it may be, uncertainty is where creativity and growth are birthed. Creativity can only exist when we step into the unknown. Consider play: part of playing or watching a game is the anticipation of not knowing who will win in the end. An adventure is only an adventure when it’s unpredictable. Possibility can only be accessed when we step outside of what we already know and what we’re certain about. Without uncertainty, life would become way too predictable, stripping away the challenges that lead to personal growth and development. Some of our most rewarding experiences stem from moments when we intentionally embrace uncertainty. It never feels good at first, but courage often doesn’t feel particularly good or comfortable. It’s through these new beginnings, with all their inherent uncertainties, that we evolve and grow.

Wrestling with uncertainty is so hard

Recently this lesson became extremely relevant to me when I went through an intense period of uncertainty in my own life. I run a business delivering trainings, mostly to community mental health non-profits. For the past few years, I've felt confident in my work. But as the last fiscal year turned over, I noticed a shift—budgets had been cut, and organizations were hiring me less. The stability I needed was beginning to slip away.

The uncertainty was intense and really scary, especially since my husband is a student right now. My income is essential. I found myself questioning whether I should quit my business and get a job. For a couple of months, the weight of the unknown sat uncomfortably heavy on my shoulders. I was facing the possibility that something I had built and nurtured might no longer have a place in the world as it once did.

In the midst of this, I realized I needed to grieve the things that weren’t serving me anymore and let them go. Holding on to what used to work wasn’t helping me. Several people supported me during this time, offering their ideas and encouragement. I began to see new possibilities. I created a new well-being program, "Foundations of Well-being," which is now gaining traction, and I’m also developing a corporate leadership program with the help of a tech-savvy friend.

What I’m doing today is different than a year ago, but these new paths have the potential to be even better. I’m actually excited about the future now, but I had to go through such a challenging time of uncertainty to get here.

In many ways, our generation has been defined by uncertainty. We've come through a global pandemic, navigated economic recessions, technological revolutions, and as a result profound cultural shift.

Reframing uncertainty

In many ways, our generation has been defined by uncertainty. We've come through a global pandemic, navigated economic recessions, technological revolutions, and as a result profound cultural shift. We've faced the challenge of finding our footing in a world that often feels like it's constantly shifting beneath our feet. And now, as many of us enter new phases of life—we're once again confronted with the fear and excitement of starting something new.

But what if we honour our resilience for managing these unknowns and reframe the way we look at uncertainty? Instead of seeing it as a threat, we can choose to view it as an invitation—a chance to explore uncharted territory, discover new strengths, and redefine what’s possible. New beginnings, with all their unknowns, are opportunities to reinvent ourselves and our lives.

Here are a few ways we can embrace the uncertainty of new beginnings:

1. Lean into ambivalence: It’s normal to feel both excited and scared when starting something new. Instead of fighting these mixed emotions, we can acknowledge them and recognize that they’re part of the process. Feeling conflicted doesn’t mean we’re on the wrong path; it means we’re human.
   
   
2. Find adventure in the unknown: New beginnings are a form of adventure. Embracing the adventure can help us shift from fear to curiosity. It’s okay not to have all the answers. We can choose play, and build more fun into our daily lives.
   
   
3. Practise self-compassion: We’re often our own harshest critics, especially when we’re venturing into new territory. Practising self-compassion means actively offering kindness to ourselves when things don’t go perfectly. It’s about recognizing that growth often comes with setbacks, and that’s okay.
   
   
4. Embrace the creative potential: Uncertainty is a powerful catalyst for creativity. When we don’t know exactly how things will turn out, we’re more likely to think outside the box and come up with innovative solutions. Try actively choosing uncertainty, even in simple ways! Take a new route home from work, cook without a recipe, go to a new restaurant, do something you wouldn’t normally do. 

As we step into new beginnings, let’s remember that it’s okay to feel a little lost. Beginnings are often not as sparkly and fun as that new box of pencil crayons when we were in elementary school. Sometimes beginnings suck. But uncertainty is part of the journey, and it’s part of what makes the journey worthwhile. By embracing the unknown, we open ourselves up to the magic of what could be. And who knows? This new beginning might just be the adventure we’ve been waiting for.